We did not sleep well on Monday, December 21st. To be totally honest, we did not sleep well for the previous day or two. Tuesday, the 22nd was our scheduled day to travel to Johnson City and meet with our third birthmother. Our excitement was high, but two previous meetings with birthmothers who had not selected us had us trying to keep our excitement and anticipation in check.

It is physically impossible not to get excited when you know you have an upcoming meeting. It is foolish to try and keep yourself from becoming to invested in day-dreaming (and even nighttime dreaming) of how this singular meeting can completely change our lives so drastically.

It is about two hours to travel from Knoxville to the Bethany Christian Services office in Johnson City. Our meeting with the birthmother and pregnancy counselor was set for 11am. Therefore, logically, Kayla and I were up at the crack of dawn and on the road by 8am. Kayla was too nervous to eat, but I downed a Sonic junior breakfast burrito as we cruised down I-40.

We arrived at the office at 10am and found that the place was locked up and the lights were off. Do we have the right date? Are we at the right location? Is this supposed to happen in Knoxville? Those are all thoughts that were racing through my mind (and Kayla’s too) but I was not going to voice them because I did not want to make Kayla nervous.

For about 45 minutes we sat in the car and talked, prayed, listened to music, and waited with bated breath for 11am to come. By 10:55, with no one at the office, we started to worry. The second birthmother we met had dropped off the radar and stopped contacting Bethany. Had this birthmother done the same? We had been so excited about this meeting and now it seemed like we had driven all the way for nothing.

Finally I broke down and called the Knoxville Bethany office just to double check that we had everything (time, date, location) correct. We were quickly assured that everything was correct and that Wanda (the pregnancy counselor) had been at court with another birthmother that morning and was likely just running a bit behind. A quick phone call to Wanda confirmed that she and the birthmother were just a few minutes away. Phew …

By 11:05ish Wanda arrived and we greeted her and the birthmother as they got out of the car. We instantly felt a good connection with the birthmother. She was kind, warm hearted, and very friendly. There are so many stereotypes about what a birthmother is like but having met three different ones I can say with certainty that each one was so very different and no stereotype fit any of them. They are real people living real lives, no different than you or me.

The meeting quickly moved inside and after a few minute hiatus for bathroom breaks our time officially began. The conversation flowed easily and it did not feel like a meeting at all, but rather like a group of people sitting down at a social event and becoming friends. It is customary to give the birthmother a small gift when meeting them and so Kayla handed her a card, and cute decorative container housing some freshly baked and decorated cookies.

What is not common is for the birthmother to give the adoptive families a present. However, our birthmother quickly reached into her purse and removed a stack of ultrasound pictures. It was apparent that these were cherished by the birthmother. However, with a big smile she handed them to Kayla and said “Here, I thought you would want some pictures of your baby girl.”

…. Talk about chill bumps! First, just hearing those words is enough to send a shiver of excitement down your spine. However, even more than that is the fact that birthmothers do not generally pick a family until a few days after a meeting. In fact, Bethany recommends that each birthmother meet with 2-3 families and after meeting them all to take a few days before deciding. However, our birthmother told us that the moment she saw our profile book she had made her decision and not only was not meeting any other family but did not need additional time to make her decision.

For the rest of our hour meeting we spent a great deal of time simply getting to know the birthmother better and begin to build a relationship with her. There was no stress to impress or “sell” ourselves to her. She was able to be herself, we were able to be ourselves and we all left very happy! Other than the ultrasound pictures, perhaps my favorite part of the meeting was when the birthmother asked if we had picked out a name yet. After a second of hesitation (I was afraid she would not like our name lol) we told her that we had picked “Amelia”. She quickly replied with how much she liked it, and how she would start calling her Amelia in the womb.

A little after noon we left from the Bethany office with huge smiles, beaming hearts, and hungry stomachs! It was time for a trip to Cracker Barrel and to make some very excited calls!

Coming up next … prepping for Amelia’s arrival!

For much of the month of December I was in full on “fanboy” mode in full preparation for the release of Star Wars: The Force Awakens.

My ticket for the 7pm showing on Thursday the 17th was purchased months and anticipation was high. As I sat in the IMAX theatre awaiting for the opening music and text crawl I was not sure how I could possibly be any happier …. and then my phone rang.

It was 20 minutes until the movie started (of course I was in my seat super early, it was STAR WARS!!!) and I recognized the number as belonging to Bethany Christian Services, our adoption agency. I quickly answered the phone, after all for them to be calling after 5pm meant I likely wanted to hear what they had to say.

Even as I answered the phone my mind was racing … A few weeks earlier we had met with a birth mother and although the meeting was different than we expected we left fairly optimistic. Unfortunately we never heard anything else from that birthmother and with the ringing phone I was wondering if perhaps she had shown back up. Even as Carrie, our case worker, began to speak I was thinking that Kayla was going to have to come pick me up from the movie theatre.

That however was not the case. Instead, Carrie told me that there was a birthmother in the Tri-Cities area who wanted to meet with us as soon as possible. This birthmother was very excited to meet us and “was the first and only people she wanted to meet with”. I listened with pure excitement as Carrie went over some of the details of the birth mother. I was trying my best to remember everything but asked Carrie to follow up with an e-mail (I knew Kayla would want all the details).

I immediately told Carrie that we wanted to meet with the mother and that Tuesday would work fine for us (the mother’s selected date). After hanging up with Carrie I called Kayla … she didn’t answer. So I text Kayla (about a hundred times) and kept calling her. Finally, with only 5 minutes to spare until the movie started she replied to the good news.

A 6:00 pm on 12/17 the most exciting thing on my mind was watching the new Star Wars movie. By 6:30 the most exciting thing on my mind was getting to meet a birth mother the next week. By 7:00pm I had a huge smile on my mind as I relived the joy of childhood (watching Star Wars) and look forward to the future.

So … how did that meeting go? I will blog about it shortly.

Hello friends and family!

I was originally scheduled to go to NYC this week for a church trip. Our church is hoping to partner with some groups in NYC for mission work next summer and I was going to spend Tuesday-Friday getting to know some of the pastors and church planters in NYC. I was looking forward to this trip (especially enjoying some pizza and Italian Ice) but something much-much better has come up!

This morning as I was leaving Wal-Mart (I needed to pick up some stuff for the trip, especially some beef jerky for the 12+ hour drive to NYC) I received a call from Carrie, our friend at Bethany Christian Services. She told me that there was a birth mother who wanted to meet us and Wednesday was the ideal day for the meeting to occur.

Normally I would not hesitate to say yes (and don’t this time was no different) but even as I said “yes, absolutely” I knew that we would have to rearrange some stuff. #1- I was suppose to be in NYC. That one is easy, I can alter that plan with little problem. #2 – Kayla has been sick for the last week and a half. This is the sickest she has been in my 5 years of knowing her and our 4 years of marriage. 3 strep tests, a flu test, and a mono test all came back negative and although she has been on 3 rounds of antibiotics she is still feeling kind of rough. I knew missing another day of work for this meeting would be tough for her, but I knew it would be worth it!

So I of course said yes and then got to give the good news to Kayla. Here is quick screenshot at how giddy I was when trying to tell her. Please note that there were a few phone calls mixed into the fray here too.

Anyway, the plan is to meet this mother at 2pm on Wednesday. We have gotten some basic information about her and the situation but, just like last time, will hold off on sharing that information for now. Suffice to say, our prayer is that God will orchestrate this entire situation according to His will. Of course we are praying that this is the child God has for us, but even more than that we pray that His will be done!

We absolutely depend on your prayers and thus wanted to fill you in!